This Too Might Suck

I’m sure you have heard the saying “This too shall pass.” I hate that saying. This too shall pass? How do we know that life is going to get better and not worse? How do we know that this season of our life isn’t going to last forever?

My husband, Adam, and I, too frequently have a conversation, that I am sure most of you have had at one point in time, it goes something like this: “Things have to start getting better soon.” Whatever you are facing in life right now I am sure you can relate. Maybe you have been searching and searching for a new job and interview after interview you still haven’t been hired. Maybe you have been trying and trying for a baby, and while everyone else is getting pregnant, you still have not seen two pink lines. Maybe you feel like you are the only one who still hasn't found the perfect person to spend your life with. Or, maybe, you are finding yourself questioning what went wrong in your marriage. For us, it has been constant setbacks to get our daughter cancer free for life. Chemotherapy not working, relapse, illnesses, side effects, relocation, transplant, bad test results, and the constant chance of cancer returning.

As a Christian, I know that God knows the outcome and the journey. He has the power to change any situation, story and ending. But, what if this doesn’t pass? What if the outcome doesn’t change and what if the situation gets way worse before it gets better? Because after all, Jesus is the only one who truly knows if this season of life is going to pass, or if this terrible storm is just starting and more rain is on its way.

All too often I think that Christians believe that nothing bad could possibly happen to them. “If we have enough faith,” the situation will get better. But friend, that couldn’t be further from the truth. Don’t get me wrong, leaning on Jesus in tough situations and surrendering through prayer is powerful. I have seen first hand that Jesus is the only way-maker & miracle worker. He can heal, restore, provide and comfort. I also know that I had a lot of faith in Jesus before my daughter was diagnosed with cancer at 3.5 years old and I have met tons of God fearing families going through unimaginable situations. None of which lacked faith in Jesus.

No where in the bible does it say that having enough faith in Jesus will prevent bad things from happening if those moments are part of the bigger plan. But luckily the bible says so many things about how to deal with the struggles. The bible teaches us that even if Jesus allows bad things to happen, he equips us with the ability to have a personal relationship with Him to overcome the situations. And, what it does say in the bible many times is that God will never ever EVER leave you, because there is purpose in His plan.

“The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." Deuteronomy 3:18

To those who doubt, I get it. You may be thinking right now, why would Jesus even allow bad things to happen in the first place. To that I don’t have all the answers. However, I do have a little girl battling leukemia who has changed the way I look at the world and despite our adversities, I have an abundance of faith in Jesus right now that He will fulfill His purpose for good, and that someday there will be no more pain in Heaven. Jesus is the only one who knows what is going to happen next, and how the story ends.

If you have met Aria Joy and know her story, you know first hand that bad things have happened to her. She has had almost 80 chemotherapy treatments in less than 9 months, she has had every type of central line possible, she was on immunotherapy, relapsed while on treatments, and had such strong doses of chemotherapy and radiation she could not leave her hospital room. At 4 years old, she has lost her hair twice, had a bone marrow transplant, and lost her ability to ever have children of her own.

At 4 years old Aria Joy figured out that no matter what, on the best days ever or on the worst, even if Jesus is allowing bad things to happen, He is using those things to make the world a better place. If you know Aria’s story, you know this to be true and I think that if you examined your life, even if it doesn’t feel like it now, you could pinpoint examples of “coincidences” that aren’t coincidences at all but God’s intervening on your behalf.

So while I hate the saying “This too shall pass,” because I know in the waiting days, months, years, and decades we believe “This too might suck,” there is hope, there is comfort, and there is peace. The waiting can be a beautiful time of connection with God. While it is hard to comprehend, and even harder to believe, God has a purpose in the periods that down right suck-- and on the days you lack faith-- He is still with you!

While I may not have faith that this season of life will pass the way I want it to, I do have faith that this season of life will happen the way God wants it to, and there is power in that. I have started to realize that regardless of the outcome, even when you are filled with more doubts than faith, even if the situation doesn’t pass, even when the situation gets worse, when bad things happen, do not be afraid, do not be discouraged Jesus is with you even in your doubting.